Bechloé saves santa
by chercharahmedseifeddine
Summary: Santa gets kidnapped and its on the bechloé to get him back


Bechloé saves santa

Chloé : damn it beca ! , what the hell is wrong with u ? u slept with all the basketball team .. what about jesse ?

Beca : dnt worry dude, me and jesse has a special arrangement ... but he doesnt have to know the details

CHLOÉ : u need help like really really serious help ... ugh

BECA : c'mon chloé u re such a buzz kill ... why are u here in the first place .. you gonna interupt my morning dark choclate bananda breakfast

CHLOÉ : ugh! u bitch need jesus

BECA : is he black ?

CHLOÉ : ugh becaaaaaaaaaa! stop it ... get your cloths on there is a man waiting for us in the house .. and stop with you blasphemy the guy looks like a priest

beca and chloé head to the house but not without beca gettin her dark choclate banana

BECA : o hi amy

fat amy : hey guys, tht dude been waiting for ya for an hour .. ammm i cant get a read on him i mean i ve done my special thing tht can see through any guy

CHLOÉ : oh no amy! u flashed him ! oh the humanity ! oh the poor guy

FAT AMY : well the guy havent spoken ever sense and he told me somethin i couldnt understand .. i think he cursed me .. well u cant get cursed twice .. my previous curse is not left up again

BECA : how do you know its not amy ?

FAT AMY : well beca! am still a fat blonde girl ! am i ?

CHLOÉ : moving on! amy go away .. we dnt want the guy to be uncomfortable .. i mean he saw u naked .. thts like 10th dates for a priest

FAT AMY : okey .. well time to get back to my penis body painting class

BECA : i hope tht priest ddnt catch a cursed STD

CHLOÉ : shut up beca .. c'mon let see wht this guy wants

BECA : oh! i love it when u get bossy *smacks chloé's ass*

CHLOÉ : god damnit beca!

the priest : young lady! what is this language ..

CHLOÉ : im sorry im so sorry ... please sit down

BECA : who the heck are you dude ?

CHLOÉ : beca ?! hmmmm thts pretty good

Beca : yes im gonna go pg13 kids show nickolodeonise the crap out of my language

CHLOÉ : good .. ammm sir please tell us why are u here ?

THE PRIEST : first of all let me present u myself : im Cardinal alejandro del frances the director of the vatican special forces

beca suddnly bown down

CHLOÉ : beca wht are you on you knees ? is tht became a reflex to you when u see a man ?

BECA : iam bowin down . isnt he somekind of a king

CHLOÉ : damnit beca u just sent women back 50 years ago

THE PRIEST : language young lady

BECA : yeah language young lady .. we are sorry your majesty .. she s a what you call in your book a "whore"

THE PRIEST : its okey i forgive her

BECA : oh look chloé you just got yourself a royal pardon

CHLOÉ : beca he is not a king he is somekind of official for the vatican goverment .. is tht right ?

THE PRIEST :yes i am ... tramp!

BECA : yeah tramp ... i will do anything for ya my king

CHLOÉ : hey why are you here dude ?

THE PRIEST : well i have some disturbin news for you guys

BECA : oh my god .. please dont tell me that i used up all my hail maries oh no! i knew i shouldnt have asked forgivness for that reverse slavery sex party i went to ..

THE PRIEST : no its not about tht .. and im sure tht god rolled his eyes on tht one .. i just have something to tell u and its comin from the vatican govrement

CHLOÉ : what does the vatican govrement wants with us

THE PRIEST : actualy the vatican govement wants nothin to do with you... if this ends up south . it will deny anything to do with you two we dnt wanna be associated with your kind

CHLOÉ : what does that suppose to mean ?

BECA : chill out chloé he means women ... continue your highness

THE PRIEST : so listen to me you two what im about to tell you is top secret even liam nesson doesnt know abt this : santa has been kidnapped

BECA : oh nooooooooo not santa! oh the bearded fat guy is probably in danger .. nooo i refuse to belive this

CHLOÉ : wait ? are u kiddin me with this ... santa as in santa clause .. wht the hell guys.. are kiddin me

BECA : hey chloé! santa got kidnapped and thts your reaction ... im gonna start crying

CHLOÉ : beca! santa doesnt exists duh!

THE PRIEST : oh! young lady thts what the vatican has led you to belive so you dont ask abt him .. he do exists

CHLOÉ : so you are tellin me tht there a bearded fat guy goes around the world handing over toys in just one night

THE PRIEST : no! thts a false story are u kiddin me thts impossible . thts absurd ... he has an army of magical elfs doing tht for him

BECA : oh he is real ! my aunt lequanda seen his ass ..

CHLOÉ : i ddnt kno tht you had a black aunt

Beca :what ? idnt

CHLOÉ : oh i just assumed tht from her name

BECA : assumed ? what the hell ! you racist whore .. because her name is lequanda .. so she got to be black

CHLOÉ : okey beca im sorry .. lets drop this ... so mr cardinal you were about to get silly

THE PRIEST : well santa was kidnapped and we got a video from the kidnappers

CHLOÉ : okey amm before we go any further and lets say i believe every word u just told us .. why did the vatican comes to us .. i mean we are just 2 normal college chicks

Beca : college college yeah yeah awoooooo

CHLOÉ : scratch tht! am just one normal college chick and she got asbergers

Beca : haha! u said ass

THE PRIEST : well it turnout that the pope asked for you in person .. he is a big fan of acapella and he said only this 2 girls can capture the kidnapper like you guys captured his heart .. i gotta tell you the pope is little bit amm how do i say it .. mentally retarded

Beca : oooh! we captured his heart

CHLOÉ : WHAT! mentaly retarded ? why did you elect him as pope thn ?

THE PRIEST : yes .. but we have to evrything he says without questionnin or i ll go to hell .. christianity is pretty crazy relegion u kno .. i mean jesus wore sandals . thts how crazy he was .. plus you Americans voted for George bush twice …. So you guys don't have a saying in tht matter

CHLOÉ : so what if we say no ?

BECA : what the hell we gotta save santa

THE PRIEST : this is a mission from god .. you cant say no .. its like sayin no to not beating up homosexuals

CHLOÉ : what ?

Beca : am i the only one here who just got the urge to go out and beating on a faggot

CHLOÉ : shut up beca let me handle this

THE PRIEST : you cant say no . or your souls will end up in hell for sure .. and if u do this you will be rewarded

BECA : will do this .. u had me at hello

THE PRIEST : i never said hello

CHLOÉ : nooo we are not doing this

THE PRIEST : well watch the video thn give me an answer

the priest pulls out an ipad and hits play

kidnapper #1 : if you dont give us 100 billion dollars we will surely kill santa

KIDNAPPER #2 : we got him and we will kill him

KIDNAPPER #1 : give us the 100 billion .. we will santa in 7 days if we dnt get the money

Beca : why are they speaking like tht .. in tht chinese accent

CHLOÉ : yeah! this dudes are white

THE PRIEST : nevermind tht! this was 2 days ago, in 3 days they kill santa

CHLOÉ : you mean 5 days

THE PRIEST : sunday is god day we rest in it tht doesnt count

CHLOÉ : okey so 4 days

THE PRIEST : hey im high priest in the vatican im not a scientist

Beca : cut the guy some slack chlo .. so when are we doin this

CHLOÉ : nooooo beca we are not doin this

THE PRIEST : if you this the vatican will confirm tht you guys will go to heaven

CHLOÉ : *sigh*

THE PRIEST : and we will provide you with every ticket to every beyonce concert

CHLOÉ : okey will do it

THE PRIEST : rihanna is way better thn beyonce

CHLOé : what did you say under your breath just now ?

THE PRIEST : nothing nothing ! I said good luck

#ToBeContinued


End file.
